Cleaning up the mess

When I was in gradeschool, there was a girl in my homeroom class whose name was Daphne. Apparently Daphne had morning sickness as a 9 or 10 year old. I suspect looking back on it that she was just the nervous type and starting the school day out for her was a fairly traumatic affair. Maybe she had a bad home situation and came to school all torn up. I don't really know--that was 50 years ago and I just know what I saw.

Every morning (almost), after we said the Lord's Prayer and the Pledge of Allegiance, Daphne would throw up her breakfast on the asbestos tiled floor. It was not a pleasant experience for anyone: the sights, the smell, the embarrassment. Every morning (almost) you could hear the janitor wheeling his squeaky-wheeled mop bucket down the hall way about 8:55. He knew what was going to happen so he was ready. He'd just wait outside the door until the Prayer and the Pledge and the Puke were finally finished. And then there was nothing to do but clean up the mess.

In church work there are times when a good leader realizes: there is nothing to do but clean up the mess. I got a letter yesterday from a lady in my church that was very upset about something I said Sunday. I was teaching on parenting and how each child has his/her own 'bent.' I talked about how my three children were different--my youngest being strong-willed and difficult to reason with. I said, "If he had been born in the Middle East, he'd a been a terrorist!" Everyone laughed, or so I thought. Her husband, a Muslim, had only been to a church twice; both occasions were at our church. The first time was Easter, the second (and she feared the last) time was this past Sunday.

So what does a good leader do? I think he/she cleans up the mess. It may not be intentional, but it is a mess nonetheless. So I called her and apologized profusely and tried to explain what I meant or rather what I didn't mean, i.e., that all Middle Easterners (or all Muslims) are terrorists. She accepted my apology and explanation. Beyond that, I offered to come over to their house and ask his forgiveness. I want him to look into my eyes (the windows of the soul) and see my sincerity. She said she'd pray about it.

That's all I can do to clean up the mess. It does no good to get defensive or deflective. Just clean up the mess. It's unpleasant and it stinks. But in the end, that's a part of dealing with sheep. And it's a learning experience to be more careful with how you phrase what you say to bring more people along with you and alienate as few as possible. What a great calling!